attention

Why gossiping is bad for you

We have all done it. At work. With friends and family. Even with strangers. Gossip. It’s probably the number one topic after the weather. It generally makes for easy conversation. Why do we gossip? Feeling of superiority When you feel bad about yourself, talking bad about someone else can make you feel superior. Part of the group If everybody else is gossiping or spreading rumors, you tend do the same thing in order to fit in. Attention When you know a secret, or are the first person to hear a [...]

2018-11-28T17:26:47+00:00October 19th, 2018|

What to do when you’ve lost your way

You have been to a retreat, or a vacation, or it's the end of the year, and you've made all sorts of resolutions during that quiet time on how you will improve your life when you're back into daily routine. And it worked. For a while. For weeks, months even, you have been doing great, implementing what you've learned, sticking to your plan and keeping your resolutions. But after six months (or even three weeks :-)) some cracks appear in that foundation. Routine kicks in. Life happens. Shit happe [...]

2018-11-29T18:32:17+00:00April 6th, 2018|

How about a little less focus?

If you focus less, you see more. Srini Pillay When I paint, there is a period of intense focus. On a certain part of the canvas, on a color, on an image. And then...it doesn't come together. I get overwhelmed, or blocked. I hate what I have done. I get confused. I do not know the next step. Intense focus doesn't only have this effect in painting. It does in life too. As human beings, when we want to change something, we tend to intensely focus on the project, plan or problem (ah, those P words.. [...]

2018-12-03T15:26:20+00:00January 12th, 2018|

How to become a likeable control freak

Further to last week's post on being a control freak, let me elaborate a bit on the topic. Some years ago, I was in a training course about Stakeholder Management. We were taught the different levels of buy-in and involvement stakeholders need to have over the course of a project. A colleague of mine, let’s call her Melissa, was having trouble with this. To her, it seemed normal that ALL her stakeholders needed to be kept happy and up to date ALL THE TIME from the beginning to the end of a proje [...]

2017-04-14T09:45:09+00:00April 14th, 2017|